My friend is heartbroken. She has tried very hard to maintain a good relationship with her cousin. They grew up together and even went to the same hostel. But if anything, her cousin gets ruder and abusive.
The near and dear,
good friends and peer!
The doodwala, the dhobi,
the maid and cabby!
Now-and-then adorable,
are mostly queer!
Keeping affairs in sync is
more chore than hobby!
Relationships are like plants. They do not grow in a day. They need nurturing. Don't give up on relationships. Work your way towards making them wholesome.
That is what we know. That is what we believe. Yet we do give up on relationships don't we?
When you do not get along with a doodwala or a dhobi, no problem. Wait till you find a better one. And go for a change. What if its a neighbour or a boss/colleague? Not easy to change house or job! What if its a family member... say an uncle or cousin? There is more at stake here. Lots of other relationships are involved too.
So you work at the connection. You try to make it better. You talk things out. You extend your conciliatory hand. You say sorry when you do not have to. You make the call though you have been ignored. You buy little presents to make them feel better. You praise. You give positive strokes. You try reason. You say nice things. You walk the mile.
Still things do not change. And that one sour relationship blocks the view.
Then what? Would I be a coward if I gave up on that link? Would I be counted as a deserter? Will the world smirk?
My physiotherapist tells me, "That cartilage in your knee is weak. Nothing can be done about it. Invest time and energy in the other muscles in your knee. They will become stronger. They will compensate for that weak cartilage".
So it is with relationships? A particular relationship is weak? Too bad. But why allow that failing to sour all waking moments. We can give it some space. We can back off and accept the truth, however harsh. And enjoy the other wonderful people in our lives.
It is not always the cowards who give up. Would you agree?
------------------------
The near and dear,
good friends and peer!
The doodwala, the dhobi,
the maid and cabby!
Now-and-then adorable,
are mostly queer!
Keeping affairs in sync is
more chore than hobby!
Relationships are like plants. They do not grow in a day. They need nurturing. Don't give up on relationships. Work your way towards making them wholesome.
That is what we know. That is what we believe. Yet we do give up on relationships don't we?
When you do not get along with a doodwala or a dhobi, no problem. Wait till you find a better one. And go for a change. What if its a neighbour or a boss/colleague? Not easy to change house or job! What if its a family member... say an uncle or cousin? There is more at stake here. Lots of other relationships are involved too.
So you work at the connection. You try to make it better. You talk things out. You extend your conciliatory hand. You say sorry when you do not have to. You make the call though you have been ignored. You buy little presents to make them feel better. You praise. You give positive strokes. You try reason. You say nice things. You walk the mile.
Still things do not change. And that one sour relationship blocks the view.
 |
| The shuttle that our mys bound Shatabdi had to wait for |
Then what? Would I be a coward if I gave up on that link? Would I be counted as a deserter? Will the world smirk?
My physiotherapist tells me, "That cartilage in your knee is weak. Nothing can be done about it. Invest time and energy in the other muscles in your knee. They will become stronger. They will compensate for that weak cartilage".
So it is with relationships? A particular relationship is weak? Too bad. But why allow that failing to sour all waking moments. We can give it some space. We can back off and accept the truth, however harsh. And enjoy the other wonderful people in our lives.
It is not always the cowards who give up. Would you agree?
------------------------
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